“Thank you so much for your time. Everything was very informative. Growing up and into adulthood you get used to making yourself smaller for other people, I feel so much better knowing that I’m not “dramatic or extra”. How I feel is real. ” – S.C. after an evaluation.

I know I don’t post very frequently on my evaluation website. My podcast publishes on my other website (drlizhypnosis.com) even when the topic is autism, ADHD, or neurodivergence. But I received the quote above recently and thought it’s important for people to know . . . Your feelings are real!

Autistic individuals as well as ADHD are often told that they’re “TOO. . . ”

• Too sensitive
• Too much
• Too dramatic
• Too talkative
• Too hyper
• Too introverted
• Too quiet

You pick but probably you’ve heard at least one of those. Often it’s used to invalidate your feelings, your actions, or even who you are. And it’s often followed by some type of advice. The “Shoulds.”

• You should just relax.
• You should get out more.
• You should sit down (and shut up).
• You should dial it back.

These feel just as awful as the first set. And are often insulting as well. As if you haven’t tried some things already.

Sometimes the person saying them is well-meaning and truly cares about you. Sometimes they’re saying it out of a place of helplessness – they don’t know what to do or how to help someone. But if it happens too much, it starts to feel judgmental or awkward or even un-safe to share your feelings or who you are.

Neurodivergent affirming psychotherapy is hopefully different. It doesn’t see you as broken or wrong. It affirms all of your differences as strengths. Even when we’re working with something you want to change and improve (the emphasis is that YOU decide that – not someone else), it’s working with your ND and hopefully not against it.

Most ND therapists truly enjoy ND clients and there is research that ND people speaking to other ND people literally understand each other better.

You’re not too much being who you are.

If you like, you can get a Free Hypnosis to reduce Fear and Anxiety.

Just a reminder that I do Adult Autism Evaluations and Neurodivergent Affirming Therapy for residents of Florida. Grab your Free Consultation with me to get the deets on working together (the how, the when, the where, and the how much).

Schedule Appointment

The post Your feelings are real appeared first on Evaluations With Dr. Liz.

The Maori word for Autism is “Takiwantaga,” which means “in their own time and space.”

Even though my last newsletter was about  Neurodivergent Love Languages, I often forget that it’s Autism Awareness Month when it rolls around because it seems to be Autism Awareness daily in our household since my youngest daughter is autistic.

It’s a factor in whether she goes to school that day (or stays home to prevent burnout or work on a project in a quiet environment).

How long I let my daughter sleep after school (as long as she likes).

What she eats & where she eats (not always the dinner table if I or someone else happens to be eating too loudly).

How many cat  / animal videos we show each other that day (a few vs many).

And frequent jokes about how autistic our dog is (highly).

In our family, her diagnosis helped increase understanding and how we interact with each other.

I don’t assume that everyone who is autistic needs to be formally diagnosed.  When adults and young adults are considering an evaluation, I always clarify what their goal is and whether it will help them or potentially harm them.

You can read more about that here (or listen in if you prefer audio).

For Eva, it also provided her with all kinds of supports needed at school and eventually college. It made her eligible for several very helpful government programs which will help pay for college, driving lessons (what???), and will help her find a job eventually.

If you have someone autistic and/or neurodivergent in your life, consider how you can best support them by asking what they need from you.

If you’re autistic and/or neurodivergent yourself, it’s always good to check-in with what you need. Because you are precious and wonderful and a miracle walking the earth.

Before you go, remember to get your Free Hypnosis to reduce Fear and Anxiety!

Just a reminder that I do Adult Autism Evaluations for residents of Florida. Grab your Free Consultation with me to get the deets on working together (the how, the when, the where, and the how much)!

Schedule Appointment

Peace and Health,

Dr. Liz

The post The Maori word for Autism appeared first on Evaluations With Dr. Liz.

People respond differently to various activities. Some feel pleasant or refreshed, and others feel calm and relaxed after an activity like this one. Some people notice little change the first time, but with practice, their control increases – as well as the benefits. If you practice this activity, your relaxation should increase, and your anxiety will decrease.

Step 1. Assume a comfortable position. You may lie down; loosen any tight clothing, take your glasses off if you’re wearing some, and close your eyes.

Step 2. Assume a passive attitude. Focus on yourself and on achieving relaxation in specific body muscles.

Step 3. Tense and relax each muscle group as follows:

• Forehead – Wrinkle your forehead, try to make your eyebrows touch your hairline for five seconds. Then relax those muscles.
• Eyes and nose – Close your eyes as tightly as you can for five seconds. Then relax those muscles.
• Lips, cheeks and jaw – Draw the centers of your mouth back and grimace for five seconds. Then relax those muscles. Feel the warmth and calmness in your face.
• Hands – Extend your arms in front of you. Clench your fists tightly for five seconds. Then Relax. Feel the warmth and calmness in your hands.
• Forearms – Extend your arms out against an invisible wall and push forward with your hands for five seconds. Then Relax.
• Upper arms – Bend your elbows. Tense your biceps for five seconds. Relax. Feel the tension leave your arms.
• Shoulders – Shrug your shoulders up to your ears for five seconds. Relax.
• Back – Arch your back off the floor for five seconds. Relax. Feel the anxiety and tension disappearing.
• Stomach – Tighten your stomach muscles for five seconds. Relax.
• Hips and buttocks – Tighten your hip and buttock muscles for five seconds. Relax.
• Thighs – Tighten your thigh muscles by pressing your legs together as tightly as you can for five seconds. Relax.
• Feet – Bend your ankles toward your body as far as you can for five seconds. Relax.
• Toes – Curl your toes as tightly as you can for five seconds. Relax.

Focus on any muscles which may still be tense. If any muscle remains tense, tighten and relax that specific muscle three or four times.

If you prefer to have a recorded relaxation that helps you reduce stress, please Join the Newsletter. Three free downloads are available for immediate download and one of them is to reduce stress.

It’s similar to a progressive muscle relaxation although I think it’s a little easier since it’s all done in your mind. You don’t have to tense and release anything. Some people prefer that to the tense/release practice.

Just a reminder that I do Adult Autism Evaluations for residents of Florida. Grab your Free Consultation with me to get the deets on working together (the how, the when, the where, and the how much)!

Schedule Appointment

Peace and Health,

Dr. Liz

The post How to do a Progressive Muscle Relaxation Step by Step appeared first on Evaluations With Dr. Liz.